It Was Always You by Ari Reavis

Author:Ari Reavis [Reavis, Ari]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2020-06-14T16:00:00+00:00

Chapter 12

Oh, God. I love him. I fucking love him. Eric is inside every piece and crevice of my heart and I am scared out of my mind. I look over at him again, the fourth time this morning, sleeping, a small smile on his face. How did this happen? Well, shit, that’s a dumb question. I know exactly how it happened. Each smile, each kiss, each conversation, and each time our bodies came together, brought us here. Made me hand over another part of my heart until he now holds the entire quivering thing in his hands.

But God, I’m terrified. I know, I know, this man is it, and even more than that, that he deserves to be it. He deserves my heart and will take care of it, but still, the thought of him hurting me scares me like nothing else. The thought of us becoming my parents, that the love I have for him could turn so sour, makes me sick to my stomach. And that thought has me inching out of bed.

I quietly tiptoe to the bathroom, closing the door behind me, just to put some distance between us. I turn the shower on and sit on the toilet. Steam fills the room as I try to talk myself off this ledge. He’s a good man. I know he is. He’s honest, caring, an above and beyond kind of caring. He treats me like gold, like I’m his greatest treasure, so what am I so afraid of?

I know what I fear, what I have feared would happen with anyone else, but I don’t fear Eric will turn into that hateful, spiteful monster. So what is it?

Maybe I fear that I’m the one who will become that monster, not him. That I’ll become bitter, causing arguments for any reason because it’s all I know. It’s the only relationship I saw growing up. People who were supposedly in love, being miserable with each other, making each other even more miserable. Supposed to love the other person, yet couldn’t seem to even bear to set eyes on them.

Can I break that cycle or will I just become another part of it, dragging Eric down with me?

I shake my head, trying so hard to leave these thoughts behind as I step into the shower. The hot water fails to release the tension that’s been there since the moment I’d realized what my heart was telling me. When I’m done showering, I get out, wrapping one towel around my body and another around my hair. I open the door quietly and breathe a sigh of relief when I see Eric is still sleeping. Then I roll my eyes at myself. What the hell is wrong with me?

I go over to my huge walk-in closet—my favorite part of this condo, especially after I got done remodeling it. I open one of the drawers and get out a pair of panties and a bra. After putting on lotion and deodorant, I pull the panties up my legs and snap on my bra.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.